After the amazing discussion at this week’s Fika, I’ve decided to throw out some questions (just a few of the very many great questions to come up during the Fika) to everyone who reads here.
What is vanilla? (within a kink/ttwd context rather than the plant or flavoring agent)
What do you mean by vanilla?
What might a vanilla person or relationship look like?
How do you know that someone/something is not vanilla?
This can mean as a real-life practicing lifestyle, fiction, readers/audience, your personal opinion…whatever!
Please leave your opinion in the comments. If you’d like to put up a post on your blog, put the link in the comments. I’ll collect all of the links/responses and put them together in a quick-reference tab for everyone to enjoy.
Sure, it’s impossible to find a definition that we all can agree on, but isn’t the point of our wonderful community to pool our diversity of experiences and knowledge?
I’m looking forward to what you have to say! No answers are too short or long.
P.S. Although I try to respond to comments promptly, this time I will refrain from commenting to let more people jump into the discussion.
Some context for these questions, if you wish (if not, just write whatever fits you best) from the Fika discussion. However, please note that my question includes vanilla as a lifestyle and not just as a reader/audience.
What is considered “spankable,” to a Spanko audience can be very different to a vanilla audience who only wants to read a little kink.
I think that about the ONLY thing a vanilla reader would put up with regarding TTWD is a threat, or maybe a one-swatter.
I think it depends on a how you define vanilla. There are plenty of readers who read BDSM but don’t practice it and don’t want to. It falls in the realm of fantasy. And the same is true of spanking. But they still find something titillating about reading it. So are they vanilla or not? If fantasizing makes one not vanilla, then very very few people would be classified as such. Where does M/M romance fit in? Heterosexual females are writing M/M for a heterosexual female audience. Are those readers vanilla?
Ana PSA: Of course we can’t forget F/F spanking, right? 😀
I read on a blog once from a couple who practices DD seriously, and SHE described them as ‘vanilla’. I thought that was so odd, because if their blog is to be believed, it didn’t look that way to me, but I can see your point very clearly that it’s what your POV is. Maybe describing an audience that might not appreciate a spanking scene as mainstream would fit better.
There’s no official definition for this relatively new use of the word vanilla, so why imagine there is one? The meaning is through context. In the context here, I think we’re trying to differentiate between an audience that is expected to enjoy a serious spanking scene, and one that might not. If I’m writing for a particular imagined audience, what matters is what they like to read. Their fantasy life is probably more relevant than their real one. People who only fantasize about something are good bets to be an appreciative audience.