Spankings for the Stubborn: Paddle Collection for Minelle

So.

I have this friend, Minelle.

She is rather a stubborn lady. She is sweet and loving and all of that, but she worries about everything and refuses to take time to rest and care for herself.

Hands up, anyone who agrees. I thought so.

Thankfully, the prayers and good thoughts are helping and her husband has shown his first signs of improvement since the surgery. Praise be!

However. As I have been passing along updates, some of us have commented how much Minelle needs a spanking to make her stop running around and helping everyone else. I mean, really.

I suggested that we take up a collection to buy her a paddle. Ami said only if it’s a pink leather one. Lillie said sure, where do we send the money? Cat said do what you can, but I know that Minelle can be hardheaded in not taking care of herself.

So I chatted with Little Miss Stubborn this morning.

A: You think I’m kidding about the paddle, don’t you?

M: It’s hilarious! You’ve even got people talking about what kinds?

A: Don’t try to worm your way out of this one, missy. Have you gotten any sleep?

M: But (lots of excuses followed by a laugh)

A: You’ll only laugh until the package arrives on your doorstep.

M: Oh my gosh, can you imagine?

A: That’s what we have to do. You know, the…*starting to laugh*

M: What?

A: (laughing)

M: What what what?

A: The harder the head, the more you need to spank.

M: OMG! I can’t believe you said that! You HAVE to tell Celeste and Renee that you said that!

A: Huh? Why…?

M: Tell them you said that, or I’m going to tell them.

A: That you’re hardheaded?

M: Just tell them!

A: Um, okay.

M: It’s so funny when we start to say one thing and it comes out sounding like something else.

(Pause.)

A: Wait. Did that have another meaning?

M: ANA! You didn’t mean it that way?

A: Um. What way? I was just surprised that you didn’t shriek at me saying you were hardheaded. And needed a spanking.

M: Ana, I am NOT explaining this one.

(Pause.)

A: It’s something sexual, isn’t it?

M: Yes. It is.

A: You remember who you’re talking to, right?

M: I said I’m NOT explaining this one!

End conclusion: Minelle needs a spanking.

So. We’re taking up a collection. A la Kickstarter, we will offer incentives to everyone who contributes to Minelle’s Paddle of Doom, to be featured prominently in my upcoming release, Minelle’s Great BDSM Adventure. If you contribute to the Minelle’s Paddle of Doom fund, here is what you will receive:

  • $1: A commemorative postcard
  • $5: A handwritten thank you note signed by Minelle
  • $10: An 8×10 frame-able commemorative thank you certificate
  • $25: A personal phone call from Minelle to thank you for helping her to be a good girl
  • $50 and over: A compromising photograph of Minelle standing in the corner after her paddling

Time is limited, so sign up now! We want to make sure that Minelle gets the care that she so desperately needs.

 

*Please note that if this blog goes silent for a few days, it is because Ana has disappeared under the Wrath of Minelle. I hope it’s less severe than the Wrath of Khan.

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40 thoughts on “Spankings for the Stubborn: Paddle Collection for Minelle

  1. minellesbreath says:

    Okay all I heard was hard and head! So I was confused by miss innocent Ana when she started laughing at her comment. I was actually floored going into naughty territory!
    Sunny herself offered to send a paddle to help my Scotsman better too! I think there is a conspiracy a foot. I’m too well behaved to need much!
    See I am sitting down just now reading!

    Like

    • Ana says:

      And all I’m hearing is that you hope the donations come in small enough amounts that we won’t have to distribute a truckload of compromising photos. This time.

      You must be doing better if you can joke around. πŸ˜‰

      Your husband will have an entire assortment of paddles for when he is better.

      Like

    • Cat says:

      Maybe you should have been sleeping instead of reading blogs Minelle. Your Scotsman definitely has his work cut out for him when he recovers. πŸ˜‰

      Like

  2. lillie says:

    I will contribute, and just need to know how to send in my donation…..also, I don’t need to receive anything, just knowing Minelle is getting the spanking she needs is good. If I double down, can I get Ana spanked as well?
    hugs

    Like

    • Ana says:

      Please call 1-800-SWAT-MIN. Operators are standing by and will take all major credit cards, as long as your HoH approves. πŸ˜‰

      Please please please don’t double down. I am sure Ian wants you to be prudent with your money.

      Like

      • Susie says:

        Double down double downed! Poor poor Minelle…innocent as a dove.

        All this writing happened during a lunch break right?

        Need we talk more about who needs to be spanked and NO, it is not me! 😯

        Like

        • Ana says:

          LOL! Susie, did you have some happy cough syrup today or something? You sound giddy. LOL!

          And um…yeah. Lunch break. That’s right. Lunch break. Yes. πŸ˜€

          Like

  3. Jade Cary says:

    Sadly, Ana has managed to distract all of you by shoving poor Minelle to the front. It is Ana who is in dire need of a spanking, and she knows it, which is why all the subterfuge. Please see through this, fellow spankers. Please.

    Like

  4. Cat says:

    Minelle definitely needs a spanking to learn how to take care of herself while her Scotsman is out of commission.

    I will be more than happy to contribute to the paddle fund – pink sounds lovely but red sounds even better – then her hubby can compare colors and make sure he gets the shade ‘just right’!.

    I’ll also be very happy to bake some cookies in the shape of paddles for the bake sale.

    Just tell me where to send everything. πŸ˜‰

    Like

    • Ana says:

      Absolutely, Cat! So great that you’re on it. Contact Celeste about the bake sale, or no bake sale, and call 1-800-SWAT-MIN with your credit card ready. I couldn’t agree more about the red, but can you convince Ami? She says she’ll only do a paddle if it’s pink leather.

      Like

  5. Rogue says:

    Um, I just talked to Minelle…and I think she may be dipping into her husband’s meds. I asked how he was doing and….

    um…

    she said “It’s 8 inches in circumference”.

    Like

  6. Bad Penny says:

    Mrs. Claus called. She says. “Someone please spank Ana already … I can’t answer one more phone call.” yeesh Ana I tried to hold her off…but I think Mrs. Claus is coming over.
    -winks-

    Penny

    Like

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