What would you give up for love? If you had to choose between the love of your life and everything that made you who you are, what would you choose? Ciara continues her adventures in this sneak peek of my new work in progress, tentatively titled Living In Sin.
(Reminder: Today is the last day to enter my drawing for the Hop Against Homophobia and Transphobia.)
I want to remind her of our first day together, sneaking kisses in between giggles as we pretended to discuss serious matters. “I love you.”
“Not enough to accept me for who I am.”
Tears sting my eyes. “You won’t accept me for who I am, either. I can’t tell my family about you. Not won’t, can’t.”
She bites her lip. “Have a nice life, Ciara. Do your next girlfriend a favor, and don’t date her. You’re not ready to be in a relationship with anyone until you get over your issues.”
I gape at her. “Don’t go,” I whisper.
“You’ve got some messed-up crap, and I should have seen it before. You want me to stay? Call your parents. Say they’ll have a new daughter-in-law as soon as marriage is legal.”
I stand, unable to move or speak, watching a split-screen movie in my head. On the one side is Audra, the only woman I’ve ever loved. On the other side are Grandma, Auntie Marge, Uncle Ted, Mom, and Dad. “Okay,” I whisper, praying that Grandma will find a way to forgive me.
“See, I told you…what?” Audra stares at me. “Okay, go?”
“Okay,” I say, trembling. “Tomorrow. I can’t do it tonight, not when they’re in bed already. I can’t.”
She keeps staring at me, trying to speak. Finally she gives an odd sort of nod. “I’ll sleep on the couch. I need some space.”
I shiver, rubbing my goosefleshed arms as she leaves our bedroom.