Prizes, playing fair, and protecting boundaries

Mini cheer and assorted announcements: Taliasman has moved up to #4 and is holding! Hurrah! Don’t forget I’ll draw for a gift basket if it reaches #1. Spank or Treat 2014 still is doing a fabulous job, too.

I believe Spank or Treat 2014 prizes have been distributed. Thank you to all of the wonderful donors. What a great event!

I’ve begun accepting registrations for Ana’s Advent Calendar prizes. Let me know if you want to contribute books, a grand prize, or something else. Please rate your books S (spanking) K (kink/edge), and V (vanilla, no spanking or kink content).

Do you have a December birthday? We will celebrate our first birthday bash this year. Tentative date: December 21. Let me know if you want to be included that day.

Speaking of birthdays, the second anniversary of my first published book is December 9. Special fun planned! 😀

Also, you can send mobi file book donations to with the subject line “Something Good donation” and I will prepare it for the Kindle uploads in the next few weeks. We have nearly $2,000 in donations for the Kindles and countless books from several publishers and independent authors. At the moment, we are looking primarily for YA, NA, and non-erotic LGBT fiction and non-fiction. If you have YA books that are not LGBT but are non romance (such as coming of age stories), please contact me.

At this time, Something Good will not register as a non-profit because the funds are better used for the youth. If this project becomes big enough to support non-profit registration, we will revisit the option.

I’m preparing a FAQ for Something Good book donations and will post it soon.

Phew! A lot of announcements these days. I guess that happens when I don’t get time to blog daily or even weekly. Today, I’d like to chat with you about prizes. Playing fair. And community, because isn’t that what this is all about?

I am sensitive–likely more than most–to the difficulties of not having money. Typically, the people with the least are the ones who give the most. At times, I’ve had to stop my friends from giving more than they could afford. I loved them for their heart, but I knew they didn’t have enough for themselves.

In the “real” world and online (which is real in its own way), my friends are givers. They like to give…no, they love to give.

It’s lovely. I love my friends who build community.

The problem? Not everyone is a giver. And if you put a taker amongst a group of givers…guess what happens?

Instead of a community built on generosity and mutual support, boundaries get violated and givers feel manipulated and that people are taken advantage.

I’m not shaming anyone. Not pointing a finger or scolding. Whenever we get a group of people together, there’s bound to be at least one glitch. We’re getting used to each other, and we’re learning how we interact as a group. New people join in; others leave for other venues. It’s a constantly shifting operation, this living entity known as Ana’s Events.

As the person in charge, it’s my responsibility to make sure (to the best of my ability) that I set up an environment in which people feel safe, welcome, and appreciated. As a diverse group of people, we have a diverse set of boundaries. Some people feel fine with actions and words that other people find offensive. Feelings get hurt. People get upset. As the Ana who organizes the events, I can’t control people but want to set good boundaries for everyone. We want to have fun and enjoy our company, right?

For that reason, I’m putting into place some rules for Ana’s Events, beginning with Ana’s Advent Calendar next month.

  • If you are a prize donor for any of Ana’s events, please give the prize exactly as stated in the publicity information. No additions or deletions. If you will only ship a physical prize to certain areas, that needs to be stated ahead of time. (See Spank or Treat 2014 for an example.) If there are extenuating circumstances, let me know. Do not offer additional prizes to other players, even if you are asked.
    Exception: If you are a participating author of Love Spanks, Sci Spanks, or Spank or Treat, you may offer additional prizes during your author chat time.
  • If you are a participant at any of Ana’s events, remember that we are all volunteers donating time, prizes, and talents.
    Be a gracious loser if you don’t win the prize you wanted.
    If you win a lot of big prizes, consider sharing the wealth with someone who didn’t win anything.
    If you do not win a prize you wanted, do not–under any circumstances–beg for a prize of your own.
    If you win a prize, respond to your notification promptly.
    Thank the person who gives you a prize. No, not everyone is able to write off prizes as a business expense. Even if someone can, there is a limit. That person chose to give the prize instead of, say, putting the money toward a business trip or conference or new office equipment.
    If you plan to play an event and not receive prizes, let me know ahead of time. No, it does not help me to spend the hours arranging prize distribution to be told, “No thanks, give it to someone else.” This is especially important for Ana’s Advent Calendar next month. Last year, some players told me (after the fact) that a book wasn’t to their taste, they didn’t want it, etc. Please remember your manners.

Let’s keep these events fun for everyone. 😀 Happy Friday!


One thought on “Prizes, playing fair, and protecting boundaries

  1. catrouble says:

    Very wise outline of behavior Ana. I am always happy if I am lucky enough to win anything. Just a note to those who might win a book in a genre other than their usual…try it…Ana attracts some awesome authors…you just might enjoy it. 😉

    Hugs and Blessings…


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