WordPress tells me that today is my third anniversary of blogging.
I’m confused about statistics, but:
- 756 posts or 1308 (I am not sure why the discrepancy!)
- 26, 656 comments (You’re all a chatty bunch!)
- 24, 657 spam comments (Thanks for slaying them, Akismet!)
- 4,060 followers (This always amazes me. I still remember the excitement of my first follower!)
However, numbers can’t express the journey of blogging. I came into the blogging three years ago, unsure of myself and wondering whether anyone would listen to me. I was not married to a man who spanked me for discipline, and all of the other DD (domestic discipline) blogs seemed to be about that.
I put up a few posts, met a few friends, and then put up some stories. A few months later, I had a book contract for what would become The Way Home, the first installment of Kat and Natalie.
Three years ago, I didn’t know whether anyone would read my blog. I thought I would be dismissed for not being like all the other DD blogs. Some did dismiss me, but others stuck around until they became friends, readers, and miscreants.
Today, the majority of my readers have never heard of DD. I’ve made friends in the LGBT community, at two author conferences, and on various social media. I’ve engraved wooden spoons to give away, made cookies to give away, and am now putting together 36 party favor bags for my online birthday party on Sunday. Let me know if you need an invitation!
What have I learned in three years?
- People will read F/F.
- People who refuse to read F/F aren’t my people, anyway…so why should I care?
- Some will come and go, but some will stay for the duration. Either way, everyone has given me something. Maybe it’s an example of what not to be, but it’s still a lesson learned.
- Success is not doing whatever I think others expect from me, but doing what I can do to the best of my ability.
- A good friend smiles and shakes her head at my love of wooden spoons. A great friend pays to have one shipped to her, styles it in a photo shoot, and cherishes it a year later.
- Not everything has to be reciprocal.
- Well-intentioned people will have strong opinions about what I should do, think, write, and feel. At the end of the day, listening too much to other people will make my writing shallow. I was told so often that Natalie was too harsh. I should make her more like the kindly husbands who gave their wives a few swats and lots of love. I made Natalie less harsh, and in the end it probably was right for that story. But in Mistress on Her Knees, I didn’t censor myself. Graciela and Trinity are not afraid of niceties, and their story satisfies me in a way that Natalie’s did not.
- Powerful women are sexy.
- Spanking is sexy, but it doesn’t have to be about a man and a woman.
- At first, I was afraid of homophobia and made my stories non-sexual. Then, I was afraid of kinkaphobia and made my lesbian stories less kinky. Now, I glory in my kinky women who love women…and I think you do, too. It’s not kink for its own sake or just to show off, but it’s about powerful women who own their power and are comfortable in who they are. Or who are not, but they are disciplined by someone who helps them to become comfortable.
Three years ago, I didn’t think anyone would read my free blog. Now, I have seventeen publications plus three more on the way and an additional three under contract.
Do I have anything to say that people will find worthwhile of their listening?
Thank you, everyone who has said, “YES!”