Five Minutes for Emily: A community message from Kat

I click through a few blogs and pause at one. Red Booty Woman…isn’t that the Christina who came a few wweeks ago with Rogue and gave me the birthday paddle? I’ve always been too shy to comment on blogs–and not permitted by Natalie who is hyper-concerned about internet safety–but this message strikes me cold. I read it again, sure that I’ve misunderstood, but the letters remain the same no matter how many times I read them. I don’t quite understand “encephalitis” or “meningitis”, but vaguely I remember that they must be serious. I shudder, thinking of when my mom’s medications failed to control her pain and she slipped into a state of not knowing anyone, not my siblings or our dad.

“Natty,” I call, but she shushes me.

“I’ve got to get this done by tomorrow or we won’t get the contract,” she says, her eyes glued to her computer screen as her fingers fly across the keyboard. “Can you tell Mom for me that I’m sorry but I can’t talk to her today?”

That’s right. It’s Sunday, and we haven’t called Dad and Mama Jane yet. “Okay,” I answer, picking up the cordless phone and punching number one on speed dial. Suddenly, I want to talk to Mama Jane more than anyone in the world.

“Kat!” Mama Jane’s voice sings out from the phone as if she is right next to me. “I’ve been waiting for you girls to call. Is everything okay?”

No, I think. But Natalie wouldn’t understand. I glance at her, and she waves her hand at me.

“Tell Mom I’m sorry,” she says.

“Natty’s got to do some work, so is it okay if I talk to you by myself today?” I ask. We usually call together, and I half-expect Mama Jane to tell me to call back when Natalie is available.

“On Sunday? Tell her that a day of rest is…”

I shrug at Natalie, mouthing “Sorry!” as Mama Jane changes topics.

“But you’re the one who called, so you shouldn’t have to listen to this. How are you?”

I get to my feet and take the phone with me upstairs to my room, closing the door behind me. I can tell Natalie that I didn’t want to interrupt her while she was working.

“Mama Jane?” I ask, and it’s hard to keep my voice from shaking.

“What’s wrong?” she responds, in the warm mother voice that never fails to make me feel safe. At least until now.

“A friend of mine, her name is Christina, well she and her husband Jim’s daughter is in the ICU and her family is all worried about her, and she’s only six and…” I have to stop before the tears overwhelm me. I may have met Christina less than a month ago, but her wisdom could only have come from years of life experience nurturing, guiding, and loving the people around her.

Mama Jane tsks in dismay. “Oh dear, will you visit her?”

“I can’t!” I wail. “They’re in Canada, and they barely know me and I can’t do anything at all for them.” I didn’t cry when my mother was in the ICU, but I am crying now. “What can I do?” I beg, knowing that if anyone can make things better it is Mama Jane. “Some of her friends are saying we should have five minutes for Emily and to pray at nine o’clock at night, but…” My voice trails off. Out of respect for Mama Jane, Natalie and I attend church weekly. She was raised to believe, but I wasn’t. I don’t really understand what it’s all about, but praying together as a family makes me feel safe. On my own, though, I have never tried. It doesn’t make sense to talk to someone you can’t see.

Then again, I’m talking to Mama Jane when I can’t see her, right?

“I’ll pray for her too, honey. What is her name?”

“Emily,” I choke out. “She’s six. God will listen to you if you pray. God will make Emily better, right?”

Mama Jane gives a heavy sigh. “I wish it were that easy. And God will listen to you just as much as me. There’s no preferred membership.”

“Wait,” I protest. “So we’re going to pray and it won’t make her better? What’s the point of praying, then?”

“Honey,” she says, with a gentle note of reproof. “You don’t pray to God only because you get what you want. What if Natalie only talked to you when you did what she wanted?”

I smile in spite of myself. Natalie does talk to me when I don’t do what she wants, but not in a way that I’m willing to tell Mama Jane! “I don’t mean to be rude,” I say, “but if the point of praying is to make sure Emily gets well, why pray if we don’t know that will happen for sure?”

Another sigh. “That’s the topic of a lot of theological discussions, Kat, and some people might think there is no satisfactory answer. But we pray because we need to be centered, because we need to be connected with our Creator, and because life can sometimes be so cruel that our only recourse is to trust in God.”

I’ve sung Christmas carols and held hands around the dinner table with Kat’s family, but I’ve never asked in this way before. “Mama Jane?” I pause, not wanting to sound childish. “I don’t think I can pray for her, I mean not if it won’t make her recover.” She starts to say something, but I forge on. “Can you pray instead of me?”

Mama Jane might say God will listen to me, but I’m not sure. If it’s this important, it’s probably better to have the expert do it.

“Of course,” she agrees. “Now, over the phone?”

I meant later, after we hung up, but I agree. It can’t hurt. And maybe God won’t mind my listening in, since I don’t know how to do the prayer myself.

As I hear rustling, I picture Mama Jane closing her eyes and bowing her head.

“Dear Lord in heaven,” she begins, and I rush to imitate her from several states away. “We thank you for all that you have given us, and for your loving care that you shower on those around us. Thank you for this day to celebrate you, and thank you for my daughters who are safe and well. We have many things for which to thank you, Lord, but today we gather in your name because one of your youngest servants needs your special care. Emily, daughter of Kat’s friends Jim and Christina, is in the ICU. To watch a child suffer is the worst thing that could happen to a parent–”

Involuntarily, I remember Mama Jane and Dad’s anguish when they found out what had happened to Natalie. I swallow hard.

“–and you know how much I pleaded for you to save my Rachel.”

The daughter she lost in infancy. I blink, surprised that I hadn’t made the connection before.

“It was the worst time of my life, Lord, and I beg for you to spare Jim and Christina the anguish of losing a child.”

For the second time, I think. The only thing worse than losing a child is to lose a second.

“We ask for you to restore her to health and to bring her safely back to her parents, but we understand that your ways are too infinite for us to understand. We ask your blessing and guidance on the medical team who treats her, and we especially ask for your loving care to surround Jim and Christina. They have other children who are frightened, and their duties as parents are split between caring for their children at home and little Emily at the hospital. Please shower them with your love, and gather them into your arms for comfort, rest, and renewal so they can return to caring for your little ones.”

I am sniffling, wondering for a mad moment if it can actually work. Will a prayer do something even if I’m not really sure I believe in it?

“We ask also for your guidance for Jim and Christina’s friends as they gather around the world to lift up Emily and her family in prayer. Please help us to pray for the right things, to accept your will, and to send positive energy instead of our fear and worry. Help those closest to Jim and Christina to be strong for them, to be supportive, and to know what is needed.”

Tears trickle down my cheeks. How did Mama Jane know?

“Most of all, Lord, we ask you to help us trust in you, to trust in your goodness and mercy, and to trust that you will do what is right. We ask all these things in your name because you promised that whenever two or three of us gather in your name, you are with us. In the name of your son Jesus who taught us to pray, Amen.”

“Amen,” I whisper through my tears, unable to say anything more.

“Kat,” Mama Jane says, and her voice makes me think I can climb mountains if she only asks. “When the world seems dark and scary, that’s the time to pray. Do you understand?”

For the first time in my life, I do. “Mama Jane?” I ask. “Can you keep praying for Emily? I know you said God will listen to me, too, but you do it better.”

“Of course,” she says, and her voice seeps out of the phone to envelop me in a hug. “Why don’t you call me at nine o’clock every night so we can join in the prayer vigil? And we will pray together.”

I want to say thank you, but instead I fumble for a tissue and wipe my eyes. “God will listen?” I ask, knowing what she will say but needing to hear it again.

“God will always listen, my dear.”

Emily, I think. Maybe we can’t do much, but we can pray. And Mama Jane is one of the best prayer allies you’ve got.

As Rogue told us, Jim and Christina’s youngest daughter is extremely sick. Emily is in the ICU with encephalitis and meningitis. They have already lost one child, and to have their six-year-old going through seizures and scary medical treatment is a nightmare no parent ever wants to face. At one point, it seems that the doctors asked them about a do not resuscitate order. Another nightmare no parent ever wants to face.

As a community, we are doing “Five Minutes for Emily”. Because we are worldwide, if each of us spends five minutes at 9 PM (our local time) praying for Emily (or sending her your positive healing energy in the manner that fits best with your style), we can have round-the-clock prayer vigils.

Rogue and Christina crash Kat’s birthday party (and give her some life advice)


Lighting the Way is finally available on Amazon! Happy birthday, Kat! Many happy returns. ūüôā

Click the book cover below for the US link.


Also, as Kat’s birthday gift to everyone–

The Way Home is now FREE on Amazon! Get your copy today!


Now…today’s birthday bash installments! Thianna Doesitmatter (I never can type that name without giggling!) has posted this hysterical birthday letter to Kat. Go and read it!

Once your stomach stops hurting from laughing, come back and read this story/interview from two women loved and respected for sharing their DD journeys. Our wonderful Rogue (from Rogue’s Awakening) and Christina (from Red Booty Woman) wrote this unique, touching, and heartfelt gift for Kat. Truly, Kat is lucky to have new friends to advise her.

Rogue being Rogue, of course there is a twist to their gift! ūüôā Enjoy!


Rogue and Christina are having a drink on the back porch at R’s house with the fire going. C is looking longingly at the flames and kicking herself b/c she forgot the paddle to burn. ¬†Rogue is oblivious to C’s distress, as she happily sips her wine.

R – So, I ran into an acquaintance recently — Ana — and she was buying a birthday cake for a friend’s upcoming celebration party. ¬†She knows about our dd lifestyles, and she began telling about her friends’ relationship. ¬†Check this out — their names are Nat & Kat.

C – NatKat. That sounds like a chocolate bar. Are they real people?

R – (chokes on wine) ¬†Yes, C, and don’t make me waste my wine. ¬†Anyway, what she told me has just¬†stuck¬†and¬†I’ve been mulling over totally butting in where I don’t belong and giving unsolicited advice. Wanna help me be nosy?

C – Sure!

R РWell, currently in their relationship, Nat is the spanker.  Kat is quite the handful and she gets spanked a lot.  This may sound crazy, but given events in their life, I think it would be beneficial for Nat to hand over the paddle and let Kat spank her.

C – Just a spanking or a complete “going Rogue”?

R – Probably just a spanking. ¬†Let me explain. ¬†They met in college and Nat immediately took Kat under her wing. ¬†Or her arm, which is beneficial for stand-up spankings, you know. (Christina sighs as she “hates” stand up spankings!) Pay attention!¬†Natalie is very bossy (Kat’s description) and she works hard to keep Kat in line. ¬†One night while at college, they found themselves in a wrong place, wrong time scenario surrounded by drunken males.¬† In a gut-wrenching move, Natalie commands Kat to return to their dorm. ¬†Kat obeys immediately without realizing that Nat didn’t follow her.

C – OMG, Rogue!

R – Christina, what Natalie did…to protect Kat…words fail me. ¬†What she sacrificed to keep her safe…

C – And you think she should be spanked for that?!

R – No, no, no! ¬†She should be given a medal for what she did. ¬†Here’s the thing. ¬†When Nat returned to the dorm, she shut herself away from Kat, from everyone, for a week, then returned as if everything was completely normal. ¬†But she wouldn’t discuss that night. ¬†Period. ¬†Understandable, but you’ve gotta get that stuff out, you know? ¬†The kicker is that Nat would never let Kat get away with not talking to her. ¬†Whenever Kat tried to withdraw, spankings abounded. ¬†Now, hang with me because there’s another glitch here. ¬†Kat was hospitalized twice for drug overdose.

C РOh, lordy.  Why?

R – I don’t know all the details about everything that’s happened because Ana held their cards close to her vest.

C – Her chest?

R – Her vest. ¬†Although, chest works, too. ¬†A vest covers your chest. ¬†*sigh* ¬†Anyway, these girls have been through hell and back with — and for — each other, C. ¬†Eventually, Kat left, claiming she couldn’t tolerate Nat’s bossiness anymore. ¬† Personally, I think she was running…

C – So where does the Kat spank Nat part come in?

R – Well, according to Ana, they were separated for a long time. ¬†Then, out of the blue, Kat gets a call from Nat…and what she wants is for Kat to be her witness at her wedding. ¬†Oh, and help shop for a wedding dress. ¬†It’s all very surreal.

C – Does she do it?

R – She does. ¬†Ana didn’t say how long they were married OR what happened to Nat’s husband — don’t ever play poker with Ana, C — but something was drastic enough to land Nat in the hospital. Long story short, Kat is the one who pulls Nat out of despair. ¬†It’s all very sad and heart-wrenching and…hauntingly beautiful. ¬†They have found their way back to each other, but they are different now. ¬†This is where the Kat-should-spank-Nat comes into play, and where I need your help. I want to write a letter to Nat and possibly Kat, but I have no idea what to say.

C – It should probably start with “Dear, Nat”.

R – Ha! That’s better than a “Dear, John” letter. So how do you convince the disciplinarian to hand over the paddle? ¬†Maybe I should start with Kat and work on helping her channel her inner domme. ¬†What to do, what to do…

C – Why do you think Kat should spank Nat?

R – Because THEY need it. ¬†Kat’s mom died when she was young and she’s been an ‘afterthought’, so to speak, from her own family. ¬†When her dad died, they didn’t even send funds for her to come home to attend the funeral. ¬†She was always “alone”, then she meets larger-than-life Nat at college, a woman who takes care of her, loves her dearly, pushes her to do her schoolwork and spanks her bottom frequently. ¬†Again, Kat claims she left because she couldn’t handle Nat’s ‘bossiness’. ¬†The flip side to that coin is Nat, who feels that Kat is her ultimate responsibility — and boy howdy, did she prove it — yet she can’t open up and talk to Kat. ¬† They need our help, C. ¬†They don’t know it yet, but they do!

C – I’m game if you are. Let’s give these girls the benefit of “us”.

R – ¬†The timing couldn’t be more perfect. ¬†Kat’s birthday is coming up soon! ¬†What a fabulous present for her to have Nat be on the receiving end of Kat’s birthday spanking. ¬†*giddy with the possibilities*

C –¬† Ever since you went “Rogue” with Jared, you think the answer to everyone’s problems is to spank each other. Every one gets a spanking!

R РWell, duh, of course!  SPANK THEM ALL, I say!!! We should start with the politicians first.

C – My friend, we crack ourselves up! *belly laughs*

R – Oh, my tummy hurts. ¬†Okay, let’s be serious now. ¬†How do we go about implementing — haha — my/our plan?

C – Do you think a letter is the best way to go? Why not crash the birthday party? We could “kill two birds with one stone” and give our advice and the gift of a Pocket Paddle from Blondie’s Place.


C – One of my¬†favorite¬†activities. ¬†Let’s go!

Enter Rogue and Christina into a hopping birthday celebration.  They have a gaily-wrapped present and with huge smiles on their faces, they ignore the festivities and approach Nat and Kat to introduce themselves.

R – Hi, I’m Rogue!

C – And I’m Christina. ¬†Nice to meet you.

R – We have a mutual friend in common, it seems…Ana. ¬†(Grabs C’s arm and whispers vehemently “Eyes THIS way!”)

C – (mumbling) Sorry.

R Р(Smiles sweetly at Nat & Kat)  Could you two take a few minutes to talk to us?

In a more private setting…

R – Thank you both so much. ¬†Ana has told us about the history of your relationship, and if it’s okay with you, I want to share something personal about mine. ¬†Christina and I both are in domestic discipline relationships, but mine has a different flavor to it. ¬†Long story short, my husband and I were at a major crossroads and ready to separate when — listen to me carefully here, girls — the paddle found its way into MY hand, and trust me, it was a surprise to both of us. ¬†It’s also been the best thing that ever happened to us.

C – It’s destructive for a relationship, in whatever format, when one partner pulls away emotionally and physically from the other. (Looks at Nat) You held Kat accountable for this behavior with a punishment spanking. Then you pulled the same behaviour on her. Perhaps you both need to think about using spanking as a tool towards healing your relationship again… only this time Kat needs to be the one who spanks Nat.

Both Rogue and Christina look at Kat.

R – You can do this, Kat (warmly). ¬†We’re not trying to preach or tell you how to live in your relationship. ¬†We just have a lot of experience, and we just wanted to — actually, Ana requested that we share it with you for a moment on this special occasion, that in moving forward, perhaps you could explore the option of a domestic discipline relationship where each of you holds the other accountable with a spanking.

C РAnd to start with, the first rule you  have is that neither of you runs away physically or emotionally from a problem. You turn to each other for support. You communicate what your needs are in an open and truthful manner. After all, you both love each other and the purpose of domestic discipline is to protect and guide the other to be the best person you can be in your relationship.

R – Aww, that is so sweet, Christina. ¬†And very true. ¬†(Looks at Nat.) ¬†Natalie, I feel as though I know you — thanks to Ana — and the fact is, you will not allow Kat to hide from you, yet you do just that to her. ¬†Remember how scared you were, not knowing that Kat was safe? ¬†That’s how she felt when you did the same. You made sure that she understood that her behavior was not acceptable. Don’t you think that Kat feels the same?

Kat and Nat look at each other.

C – I’m sure it feels like you’re in this all alone. I remember that feeling. I hope you’ll consider joining our Ladies Night at the LDD Network, where women from all over the world, who practice DD in different ways, meet to talk about issues, offer support… and have a lot of giggles.

R – We do have a great time, and the support we give and receive is priceless. ¬†(Looks at Nat again.) ¬†The responsibility you feel toward Kat is understandable — you have saved her more than once. ¬†But you¬†must¬†open up and let her in. ¬†I recognize how hard that will be for you, given all you’ve been through, but if you don’t, I fear you may lose her again. ¬†And you two belong together, Natalie. ¬†Some bonds are unbreakable. ¬†I know it’s unorthodox, but…please give it some consideration. ¬†(Looks at Kat.) ¬†Yes, Natalie saved you, and there is no doubt in anyone’s mind that¬†she would do it again, but finding yourself on your own, you pulled through. ¬†Lonely, sure, but you did it. ¬†Be grateful that this lovely woman stands beside you, but don’t underestimate your own strength.

Rogue hands Kat the gift.

R РWe have a gift for you to start what hopefully will be a new beginning in your relationship.  Happy Birthday, Kat! (Both Rogue and Christina give Kat and Nat a warm hug).

As Rogue and Christina turned, they linked their arms together and headed back to the party.¬† Looking back, they saw the girls start to open Kat’s gift.¬†¬†Along with the present of¬†the Pocket Paddle, there was a card¬†that suggested…

“Go find Ana and give her a stand-up spanking for being such a gossip!”


And¬†afterwards…thank her.¬† ūüėČ

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